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INGERSOLL 



Under the Microscope 



COL. R.G. INGERSOLL'S 

RECKLESS MISSTATEMENTS EXPOSED 
AND HIS MENTAL AND MORAL 
CHARACTERISTICS 
ANALYZED 



n 



J. M. BUCKLEY, D.D. 



NEW YORK : HUNT & EATON 
CINCINNATI : CRANSTON & CURTS 
1892 



1 — 



1*1 



Copyrigh 
HUNT & 
New 



t, 1892, by 

EATON, 
York. 



INGERSOLL UNDER THE MICROSCOPE. 



A few days before Christmas, 1891, a 
daily paper published a contribution entitled 
" Colonel Ingersoll Preaches a Christmas 
Sermon." The "sermon" was a tissue of 
falsehoods so far as it related to Christianity. 
Finding the paper circulating in Christian 
families, in the ordinary course of its 
duty — one branch of which is to defend 
Christianity from sappers and miners with- 
in and traducers without — The Christian 
Advocate, of New York, contrasted those 
falsehoods with passages of Scripture which 
contain the principles of Christianity and 
its invitations and promises to all men, and 
conclusively proved the author of the 
Christmas sermon to be a libeler of the 
God of love. 

These were its statements, the most mon- 



4 IxGERSOLL UNDER THE MlCROSCOPE. 

strous falsehoods the human mind could 
conceive: 

Christianity did not come with tidings of great 
joy, but with a message of eternal grief. 

Contrast this libel with the Gospel: 
"Glory to God in the highest, and on 

earth peace, good-will toward men." Luke 

ii, 14. 

" Come unto me, all ye that labor and are 
heavy laden, and I will give you rest." 
Matt, xi, 28. 

" I say unto you, that likewise joy shall 
be in heaven over one sinner that repenteth, 
more than over ninety and nine just per- 
sons, which need no repentance." Luke 
xv, 7. 

" And he said unto Jesus, Lord, remember 
me when thou comest into thy kingdom. 
And Jesus said unto him, Verily, I say unto 
thee, To-day shalt thou be with me in para- 
dise." Luke xxiii, 42, 43. 

It has rilled the future with fear and flame, 
and made God the keeper of an eternal peniten- 
tiary, destined to be the home of nearly all the 
sons of men. 

Contrast the following precious truths 
with that base slander : 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 5 



"But Jesus said, Suffer little children, 
and forbid them not, to come unto me; for 
of such is the kingdom of heaven." Matt, 
xix, 14. 

"Then Peter opened his mouth, and 
said, Of a truth I perceive that God is 
no respecter of persons: but in every na- 
tion he that feareth him, and worketh 
righteousness, is accepted with him." Acts 
x, 34, 35. 

"The Lord is not slack concerning his 
promise, as some men count slackness; but 
is long-suffering to us- ward, not willing that 
any should perish, but that all should come 
to repentance." 2 Pet. iii, 9. 

Not satisfied with that, it has deprived God of 
the pardoning power. 

How these words refute the traducer of 
the God of love! 

" My little children, these things I write 
unto you, that ye sin not. And if any man 
sin, we have an advocate with the Father, 
Jesus Christ the righteous : and he is the 
propitiation for our sins: and not for ours 
only, but also for the sins of the whole 
world." 1 John ii. 1. 2. 



6 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 



" For God so loved the world, that he 
gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever 
believeth in him should not perish, but have 
everlasting life." John iii, 16. 

" Whom God hath set forth to be a pro- 
pitiation through faith in his blood, to de- 
clare his righteousness for the remission of 
sins that are past, through the forbearance 
of God." Rom. iii, 25. 

The daily paper sent those blasphemies, 
with every artifice which the press can use 
to make the poison palatable, into homes 
where children were learning the Christmas 
carols, to declare to them that their fathers 
were teaching them a base deception, and 
their mothers were instilling into them folly 
and falsehood, and that those parents are 
themselves among the simpletons and feeble- 
minded of the world because they have be- 
lieved that pure Christianity means " Glory 
to God in the highest, and on earth peace, 
good-will toward men." 

Every copy sent by mail went into the 
house as an enemy might introduce a 
South American scorpion coiled in a basket 
of fruit. 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 7 

What that paper did would have been 
at any time grossly improper. To send out 
•such matter from a man holding such an 
attitude toward Christianity at such a time 
and call it a Christmas sermon was an in- 
sult to every one of its readers who bow the 
Jknee at the name of Jesus. 

THE ISSUE. 

Colonel Ingersoll, stung by the exposure 
of his misrepresentations, came forward in a 
communication to the willing vehicle of his 
libels, in his own handwriting, to defend 
himself against the charge of uttering 
gigantic falsehoods, and said: 

Let us take up these "gigantic falsehoods " in 
their order and see whether they are in accord 
with the New Testament or not — whether they 
are supported by the creed of the Methodist 
Church. 

I insist that Christianity did not come with 
tidings of great joy, but with a message of eternal 
grief. According to the orthodox creeds, Chris- 
tianity came with the tidings that the human 
race was totally depraved, and that all men were 
in a lost condition — and that all who rejected or 
failed to believe the new religion w T ould be tor- 
mented in eternal fire. These were not tidings 
of great joy. 



8 Ingersoll under the Microscope, 

If the passengers on some great ship were told 
that the ship was to be wrecked — that a few 
would be saved, and that nearly all would go to 
the bottom — would they talk about 1 ' tidings of 
great joy ? " 

In this he shows that he knows nothing 
of the " Creed of the Methodist Church." 
He has confounded it with the most ex- 
treme form of Calvinism. 

Methodism as taught by John Wesley — 
all the Methodism which ever existed except 
a small section known as Calvinistic Method- 
ists — was a protest against this. Methodism 
teaches that, although all are born with evil 
moral tendencies, the Spirit of God enters 
every human heart, making it possible for 
every man to be saved, and continually 
drawing him thereto. This doughty cham- 
pion is ignorant of this. 

The illustration of the ship is very good; 
but not for his use. Christianity found the 
world sunk in heathenish vice and supersti- 
tion and Jewish formality, with here and 
there noble exceptions. It was, indeed, like 
a great ship drifting before winds and waves, 
apparently destined to go to the bottom. 
Christianity came, like another great ship, 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 9 

well-manned and officered, with reliable chart 
and compass. It drew alongside the drift- 
ing doomed ship, and offered to take all the 
passengers on board, and guarantee them a 
safe voyage to a most desirable port. Only 
those who persistently refused to leave the 
foundering ship were to be left behind. Is 
not such a message " tidings of great joy ? " 

To show that Christ did not come to bring 
peace, he says: "Think not that I am come 
to send peace on earth : I came not to send 
peace, but a sword." In this and what fol- 
lows Christ simply forewarns his disciples 
that in some instances their parents, in others 
their children, would resist their following 
him, and they must not expect that they 
could be his disciples without enduring 
much hardship for him. 

Now, as to the message of eternal grief ? — 
He quotes this and several texts of simi- 
lar meaning: 

1 1 And these shall go away into everlasting 
punishment: but the righteous [meaning the 
Methodists] into life eternal," 

and then says: 

Knowing, as we do, that but few people have 



10 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 



been believers, that during the last eighteen hun- 
dred years not one in a hundred has died in 
the faith, and that consequently nearly all the 
dead are in hell, it can truthfully be said that 
Christianity came with a message of eternal 
grief. 

When he puts into the text " [meaning 
the Methodists] " he gives an illustration of 
his ordinary style. The Methodists have 
taught from the beginning that all believers 
in Christ, whatever their name, receive the 
benefits of salvation. It was their glory 
that they required no man to hold any par- 
ticular creed or form of opinions provided 
he believed in God the Father Almighty, 
and in Jesus Christ, repented of his sins, 
and tried to live a righteous life. The sub- 
scription required of its members is the 
most general character sufficient to pre- 
vent false teachers from insinuating them- 
selves. It would have been equally slander- 
ous had he inserted Presbyterians, Baptists, 
Congregationalists, Lutherans. For they 
do not, and never did, believe that the 
saved are confined to their own members. 
The Roman Catholics expressly disavow 
that. 



IxGERSOLL UNDER THE MlCEOSCOPE. 11 



That " nearly all the dead are in hell," and 
that God is the keeper of an eternal peni- 
tentiary destined to be the home of " nearly 
all the sons of men," is an untruth of such 
monstrous proportions that it spans the uni- 
verse. 

" Suffer little children to come unto me, 
and forbid them not: for of such is the king- 
dom of God." By these words Jesus de- 
clared the doors to everlasting life open to 
more than half the population of the globe 
in all ages and lands, from the first birth to 
the end of time. 

"For until the law sin was in the world: 
but sin is not imputed when there is no 
law." " For when the Gentiles, which have 
not the law, do by nature the things con- 
tained in the law, these, having not the law, 
are a law unto themselves." 

a Then Peter opened his mouth, and said, 
Of a truth I perceive that God is no re- 
specter of persons: but in every nation he 
that feareth him, and worketh righteous- 
ness, is accepted with him." 

Here, then, all who die before being ma- 
ture enough to reject Christ intelligently, 



12 IxGERSOLL UNDER THE MICROSCOPE. 

deliberately, and willfully — which means 
much more even than many Christians seem 
to think — are saved. All who through 
arrested mental development remain in- 
fants are saved. Those who never heard 
of Christ, but live according to the light 
they have, in every land, are accepted by 
God. 

Christianity teaches that whether the de- 
lay in Christ's coming be long or not, it 
is solely for the purpose of increasing the 
number of the finally saved. "The Lord 
is not slack concerning his promise, as some 
men count slackness ; but is long-suffering 
to us-ward, not willing that any should per- 
ish, but that all should come to repent- 
ance." 

In degrading the New Testament he en- 
deavors to show that it is worse than the 
Old: 

Iu the Old Testament there is nothing about 
punishment in some other world, nothing about 
the flames and torments of hell. . . . The Old 
Testament gave the future to sleep and oblivion. 
But in the New Testament we are told that the 
punishment in another world is everlasting. 

He has caught up without investigation 



Ingeesoll undek the Microscope. 13 

the vagary that the Old Testament has 
nothing to say about a future life. It does 
say but little, since Jehovah, by special 
miracles, subdued his enemies, and chastised 
his people for sin or rewarded them for obe- 
dience. But that the future life had a place 
in the thoughts of the righteous is made 
clear by the translation of Enoch for special 
piety, and the ascension of Elijah for 
special services. 

The psalmist prayed that he might be de- 
livered from " men of the world which have 
their portion in this life," and said in con- 
trast: "As for me, I will behold thy face in 
righteousness: I shall be satisfied, when I 
awake, with thy likeness ; " and affirmed that 
God would guide him with his counsel, 
and afterward receive him to glory. In 
Daniel it is expressly declared that " many 
of them that sleep in the dust of the 
earth shall awake, some to everlasting 
life, and some to shame and everlasting 
contempt." 

From these passages and others, as well 
as from their traditions, by far the most 
numerous sect of the Jews held a future 



14 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

state for both the righteous and the wicked, 
though a few Christian commentators deny 
it to the wicked both on New and Old Tes- 
tament grounds. 

Does not this flippant traducer of the liv- 
ing and the dead know that John Wesley 
shook off the misconception that included 
the heathen under a general and indiscrim- 
inate law of condemnation, and in his ser- 
mon on " Living Without God " said: " Nor 
do I conceive that any man living has a 
right to sentence all the heathen and Mo- 
hammedan world to damnation. It is bet- 
ter far to leave them to him that made them, 
and who is the Father of the spirits of all 
flesh, who is the God of the heathens as 
well as the Christians, and who hateth noth- 
ing that he has made ! " Does he suppose 
the American people generally are so igno- 
rant of the Bible as not to know that it ex- 
pressly declares: "For I have no pleasure 
in the death of him that dieth, saith the 
Lord God: wherefore turn yourselves, and 
live ye ? " Does he not know the Bible 
teaches that the number of the finally saved 
will be as the stars of heaven, and as the 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 15 

sands upon the sea-shore innumerable, " out 
of every kindred, and tongue, and people, 
and nation?" Christianity teaches that 
Christ died for the whole world ; that the 
Holy Spirit is given to every man ; that 
none who have no light will be condemned; 
and that the test at the judgment-seat of 
Christ will be applicable to any degree suf- 
ficient for responsibility. Even those who 
reverently doubt — if they be true to the 
light which is in them — will be of the multi- 
tude that no man can number. 

This doctrine, the future everlasting pun- 
ishment of the incorrigibly wicked, he says, 
"is the infamy of infamies," because men 
are finite beings and time a finite period. 
Yet he knows that the gravity of an offense 
is not determined by the time it takes. 
Murder, one of the greatest of crimes, can 
be committed in a short time. One can be- 
tray his country in five minutes ; acts of 
wickedness which can change the character 
beyond any means of restoration known to 
man have been conceived and executed in a 
few minutes. Is it "the infamy of infa- 
mies" where a just government promises 



16 IXGERSOLL UNDER THE MlCROSCOPE. 

all law-abiding people protection at every 
cost, and threatens incorrigible outlaws 
with destruction? Ingersoll undertakes to 
say what it would be right for an infi- 
nitely wise God to do. His principles are 
those from which anarchism logically fol- 
lows. 

Though he says in this reply that he [In- 
gersoll] has " good mental manners," he also 
affirms that whoever believes in the justice 
of expelling from heaven and punishing 
those who persistently sin against all God's 
efforts and pleadings, " is suffering from at 
least two diseases — petrifaction of the heart 
and putrefaction of the brain." 

This weak alliteration disappears in the 
presence of names, "the latchet of whose 
shoes he is not worthy to stoop down and 
unloose." Who believed it ? Milton, poet,, 
patriot, scholar ; Pascal, of mind and 
heart the peer of any man who ever lived • 
Elizabeth Fry, type of woman at her best 
in brain and heart ; John Howard, the 
" friend of the prisoners ; " Wesley, who 
gave his days to saving men's bodies from 
intemperance, vice, and poverty, their minds. 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 17 

from ignorance, their hearts from impurity 
and sin, to whose all-inclusive philanthropy 
nothing was trivial that would make men 
happier ; Wilberf orce, who gave himself to 
humanity, and broke the chains from slaves 
without distinction of color ; Michael Far- 
aday, the father of modern experimental 
chemistry ; Jonathan Edwards, with brain 
as great as ever America produced, yet 
ready to walk five miles at midnight, through 
the snow, to nurse the sick child of a poor 
man ; Father Matthew, who consumed him- 
self in his zeal to deliver his countrymen 
from poverty and drunkenness ; Muhlen- 
berg, who spent his days in doing good 
of every sort, and gave New York St. 
Luke's Hospital ; Livingstone, who essayed 
to lift Africa into light, and died upon 
his knees after a life of heroism unsur- 
passed, praying to the Jehovah of the 
Old Testament in the name of Christ of 
the New Testament ; and millions of men 
and women who have given their lives to 
the welfare of humanity — these all be- 
lieved that deliberate, willful, incorrigible 
rejecters of God in Christ would be banished 



18 IxGERSOLL UNDER THE MlCROSCOPE. 



from his presence and that of his redeemed 
people. 

These great names are not brought for- 
ward to prove the doctrine true which they 
held, but to show that men of the purest 
heart, strongest mind, and noblest life held 
it, and were stirred by it to heroic and self- 
sacrificing efforts to save men. 

Over one island in the sea of eternity 
Christianity leaves a dark shadow ; but not 
one innocent or penitent soul is there ; not 
one is there who did not choose death rather 
than life ; not one whom God could save 
without repudiating the essential distinction 
between sin and righteousness. 

THE MAN. 

What are the characteristics of the man 
who says such things in such a spirit ? Col- 
onel Ingersoll is brilliant both as an orator 
and rhetorician. Of philosophy he has none; 
of logic considerable of the kind most useful 
before an ordinary jury and least serviceable 
before a judge of the highest rank. In his 
professional career his logic has been used 
according to the necessities of the case 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 19 

which he had in hand, and he has been suc- 
cessful. Where logic fails, wit and pathos 
reenforce a feeble argument, so that he is a 
dangerous antagonist before a jury, unless 
his opponent have resources similar to his 
own. In his treatment of religious and 
moral questions his logic has simply been 
the servant of his passions and prejudices. 
To the realm of philanthropy he has sel- 
dom, so far as we are able to ascertain, 
applied himself. His popular lectures on 
religious subjects have been marked by 
a coarseness and blasphemy to which 
Thomas Paine never descended, and they 
have been particularly adapted to " split 
the ears of the groundlings." 

Two or three Catholic priests of great 
ability have replied to him in kind (except- 
ing the blasphemy), and literally pulverized 
every thing of the nature of an argument 
he advanced. 

The North American Review introduced 
him to another class of readers. It began by 
inviting Colonel Ingersoll to write an article, 
and J udge Jeremiah Black, the great Penn- 
sylvania lawyer of the old school, to reply. 



20 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

Then came Drs. Lyman Abbott, Henry 
M. Field, Professor Fisher, of Yale, and Mr. 
Gladstone. Professor Fisher moved on an 
intellectual plane so much higher than Col- 
onel Ingersoll that it is doubtful if the lat- 
ter could really comprehend, though he 
might apprehend verbally, what Professor 
Fisher said. 

Dr. Field wrote in his usual elegant style 
and in a benignant, almost paternal spirit, 
apparently entirely misunderstanding the 
nature of the man with whom he was con- 
tending. He might as well have stood in 
the Haymarket in Chicago and requested: 
the anarchists, when they were exploding 
their bomb, not to make a noise, as it was 
disturbing the nerves of the public. 

Mr. Gladstone paid almost no attention 
to Colonel Ingersoll, but simply furnished an 
article in his usual magnificent style, fulfill- 
ing his contract with the proprietor of the 
Review. Dr. Abbott made the closest ap- 
proach to a reply, writing with unusual 
felicity; but, not himself being prepared to 
maintain the ordinary Christian ground on 
most of the fundamental points of objection 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 21 

alleged by Colonel Ingersoll, there was nc> 
issue joined. Nor could any representative 
of Christianity have done better. 

None of these able men could cope with 
him, for the same reason that Von Moltke, 
though the greatest general of modern times, 
would have been, in personal encounter, as 
an infant in the hands of John L. Sullivan. 
No one could contend with Colonel Ingersoll 
who has any sense of reverence or any repu- 
tation for genuine sensibility to lose. Be- 
fore the Nineteenth Century Club of New 
York he spoke, and was followed by the 
Hon. Frederic R. Coudert, who referred to 
his mother's religion, and also spoke of the 
ease with which destruction can be wrought. 
Having said: "The babe began by destroy- 
ing his bib " he passed on to the magnifi- 
cent building in which they stood, and said 
that it took months, and possibly years, to 
build it, to adorn it, to beautify it, and ex- 
claimed, " I will find a dozen men who, 
with a few pounds of dynamite, will reduce 
it and all of us to instant destruction." 

Colonel Ingersoll replied: 

No doubt Mr. Coudert has the religion of his 



22 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

mother, and judging from the argument he made 
his mother knew at least as much about these 
questions as her son. . . . One word more.] 
The gentleman says that children are destructive 
— that the first thing they do is to destroy their 
bibs. The gentleman, I should think from his 
talk, has preserved his ! 

These extracts are from the authorized 
pamphlet publication. 

In all these discussions there has been 
ample opportunity to study the mental 
characteristics of Colonel Ingersoll. In all of 
them there has never been a syllable to show 
that he has comprehended one of the least 
of the spiritual truths of Christianity, or 
had a feeling of reverence for any thing 
larger or more exalted than himself; that 
he has any proper sense of the effect of 
his words; and he has practically declared 
that if his doubts of the existence of a God 
were removed he would care little or noth- 
ing for him. 

You cannot injure an Infinite Being if there be 
one. I will tell you why. You cannot help him, 
and you cannot hurt him. If there be an Infi- 
nite Being he is conditionless — he does not want 
any thing — he has it. . . . So do not trouble 
yourself about the Infinite. 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 23 

Among the long list of blasphemers he 
shows the least delicacy, the least sense of 
responsibility, the most hardihood, and the 
most recklessness; takes the least pains to be 
accurate; makes the most unguarded and 
untrue statements; is most the slave of his 
words, most the creature of his moods. In 
deceiving the ignorant and the unwary, and 
tickling the ears of haters of all restraint 
who wish to live without fear of being 
judged for their deeds, he is wonderfully 
skillful. But in sound argument on relig- 
ious subjects he is the least difficult to meet 
of the infidels of modern times whose as- 
saults have made them notorious. This is 
owing to his being ignorant of many things 
necessary to such a discussion and to the 
reckless inaccuracy of his assertions. In one 
of his recent diatribes he says : 

As to the reclamation of inebriates. Much has 
been said, and for many years, on the subject of 
temperance — much has been uttered by priests 
and laymen — and yet there seems to be a subtle 
relation between rum and religion. Scotland is 
extremely orthodox, yet it is not extremely tem- 
perate. England is nothing if not religious, and 
London is, par excellence, the Christian city of 
the world, and yet it is the most intemperate. 



24 IxGERSOLL UNDER THE MlCROSCOPE. 



The Mohammedans — followers of a false prophet 
— do not drink. 

He knows the history of the temperance 
movement; he knows that Christianity in 
this country has upheld it till most of the 
Churches require total abstinence and all 
denounce drunkenness. Probably he knows 
that those principles are spreading rapidly in 
Scotland and England. Perhaps he knows 
that Mohammedan communities contain 
many that drink and that many are addicted 
to hasheesh and other drugs more pernicious 
than alcohol. In this country, whatever 
Christians have done for temperance has 
been done not only without his aid, but 
against his influence. Yet Colonel Ingersoll, 
who had the audacity to write the forego- 
ing, wrote also this: 

INGERSOLL'S EULOGY OF WHISKY. 
I send you some of the most wonderful whisky 
that ever drove the skeleton from the feast or 
painted landscapes in the brain of man. It is 
the mingled souls of wheat and corn. In it you 
will find the sunshine and the shadow that chased 
each other over the billowy fields ; the breath of 
June, the carol of the lark, the dew of night, the 
wealth of summer and autumn's rich content, all 
golden with imprisoned light. Drink it, and you 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 25 

will bear the voices of men and maidens singing 
the u Harvest Home," mingled with the laughter 
of children. Drink it, and you will feel within 
your blood the startled dawns, the dreamy, tawny 
dusks of many perfect days. For forty years this 
liquid joy has been within the happy staves of 
oak, longing to touch the lips of men. 

St. Peter describes this style: "Great 
swelling words of vanity, alluring through 
the lusts of the flesh, through much wanton- 
ness. While they promise them liberty, 
they themselves are the servants of corrup- 
tion: for of whom a man is overcome, of the 
same is he brought in bondage." We do 
not intimate that Colonel Ingersoll is a 
drunkard, but that he is in bondage to his 
own self-indulgent, reckless, arrogant spirit, 
and knows nothing of true liberty. 

No other man who possesses such wealth 
of language would debauch it to such a 
service. Had he studied the Bible he hates 
and his favorite Shakespeare, he might have 
written truthfully: 

THE DIREFUL WORK OF WHISKY, 

I send you some of the most wonderful 
whisky that ever brought a skeleton into 
the closet or painted scenes of lust and 



26 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

bloodshed in the brain of man. It is the 
ghosts of wheat and corn crazed by the loss 
of their natural bodies. In it you will find 
a transient sunshine chased by a shadow as 
cold as an arctic midnight in which the 
breath of June grows icy, and the carol of 
the lark gives place to the foreboding cry 
of the raven. 

Drink it, and you shall have " woe," " sor- 
row," " babbling," and "wounds without 
cause;" "your eyes shall behold strange 
women," and "your heart shall utter per- 
verse things." Drink it deep, and you shall 
hear the voices of demons shrieking, women 
wailing, and worse than orphaned children 
mourning the loss of a father who yet lives. 
Drink it deep and long, and serpents will 
hiss in your ears, coil themselves about your 
neck, and seize you with their fangs ; for 
"at the last it biteth like a serpent, and 
stingeth like an adder." For forty years 
this liquid death has been within staves of 
oak, harmless there as purest water. I send 
it to you that you may " put an enemy in 
your mouth to steal away your brains." 
And yet I call myself your friend. 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 27 

The New Testament describes the rever- 
ent doubter who longs for truth and cer- 
tainty and for help in struggling up- 
ward, and tells the Christian to be ready 
ever to give a reason for the hope that is in 
him. To him it says: 

If any man will do his will, he shall know of 
the doctrine, whether it be of God, or whether I 
speak of myself. 

And it gives him a prayer, " Lord, I be- 
lieve, help thou mine unbelief." Ofmck it 
says: 

Him that is weak in the faith receive ye. If 
any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that 
giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not ; 
and it shall be given him. 

But of proud, arrogant haters of the Gos- 
pel Jesus said: 

Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, nei- 
ther cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they 
trample them under their feet, and turn again and 
rend you. 

He does not call them dogs or swine, but 
teaches that, as these will destroy what does 
not suit their appetites and attack those who 
cast pearls before them, so it is in vain to 



28 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

try to lead such men to Christ. For they 
will but contradict, caricature, blaspheme, 
and denounce those who would save them. 

INFIDELS AND THEIR WORK. 

At all times since Christ came there have 
been unbelievers, many of whom have been 
bold and aggressive. 

In modern times many of them have be- 
come Spiritualists, reacting from the ex- 
treme of unbelief to that of credulity. The 
most recent instance is Madame Annie Be- 
sant, who three years ago was chief speaker 
for the infidels, and now adopts the humbug 
of Theosophy. 

Many who before middle life had been 
pronounced and aggressive infidels have 
later on become reserved, and have some- 
times expressed themselves doubtfully con- 
cerning the positions of which they had 
been so confident. And many have become 
earnest Christians. One of the most fam- 
ous and audacious infidels of this century 
was Joseph Barker, far abler in argument 
and a greater master of forcible English 
and little less an orator and wit than In- 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 29 

gersoll. After meeting and vanquishing 
many conspicuous and several really able 
advocates of Christianity, and temporarily 
greatly promoting infidelity, Mr. Barker, 
while in the maturity of his powers, re- 
nounced infidelity and devoted the re- 
mainder of his life to undoing the evil he 
had done. He did this without any pecun- 
iary motive, as he was a man of property, 
and asked nothing of the Church. 

We heard him in one of his debates when 
an infidel, and again twenty -five years after- 
ward, when he had become a Christian. His 
death was remarkable for the clearest testi- 
mony to his faith in Christ. He called his 
eldest son, his lawyer, and one of his trust- 
ees to his bedside, and said : 

I feel that I am approaching my end, and de- 
sire that you should receive my last words and be 
witness to them. I wish you to witness that I 
am in my right mind, and fully understand what 
I have just been doing; and dying, that I die in 
the firm and full belief of Jesus Christ, and in 
the faith and love of his religion as revealed in 
his life and works as described in the New Testa- 
ment ; that I have an abiding faith in and love of 
God, as God is revealed to us by his Son Jesus 
Christ ; and I die trusting in God's infinite love 



30 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

and mercy, and in full faith of a future and bet- 
ter life. 

I am sorry for my past errors ; but during the 
last years of my life I have striven to undo the 
harm I did by doing all I was able to serve God 
by showing the beauty and wisdom of the relig- 
ion of his Son Jesus Christ. I wish you to write 
down and witness this my last confession of faith, 
that there may be no doubt about it. 

His death occurred at Omaha, Neb., and 
the facts are made public by his son, Joseph 
Barker, Jr., who gives the names of Mr. Gil- 
bert, his father's lawyer, and Mr. Kellom, 
his trustee, as witnesses. 

Not an argument has ever been made 
against Christianity by Colonel Ingersoll 
that was not more accurately and concisely 
made by Joseph Barker, and in logical de- 
fense of his position the latter was much 
the stronger. Many of his points have lost 
their weight on account of the adoption of 
more consistent views of the relative author- 
ity of different parts of the Bible, and of 
the diversity and latitude of its style, than 
were then allowed. 

Many similar cases of the renunciation of 
infidelity by its ablest advocates might be 
given, often brought about by the sorrows 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 31 

of life and by observation and experience 
of the awful consequences of a loss of faith 
in God, of the sense of moral responsibility, 
and of belief in a future life. 

Meanwhile the Church has lived on. The 
infidels of each age predict its speedy death. 
They die. Christianity lives, and never 
showed greater energy or momentum than 
to-day, Its fundamental unity admits of 
organization; infidelity is always disinte- 
grating, and liberal leagues, which such 
men as Ingersoll establish, are mere con- 
claves for shouting maledictions at the 
ever-increasing millions of the Christian 
Church. 

It is the judgment of some that Ingersoll 
does a great deal of harm. While no doubt 
his influence is evil, it is, in our opinion, 
much less than it would be if he w r ere not 
so careless and extravagant. Thousands of 
persons who are not roused to side for or 
against God, learning what orphans Ingersoll 
makes of the inhabitants of the world, how 
he throws doubts over immortality, im- 
peaches the goodness of God if there be one, 
denies the freedom of man, and undermines 



32 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

conscience, shrink from the abyss to which 
he leads. Some have tried to follow him 
and to make a scheme of life without God, 
or any real expectation of a future life; 
but the effect upon their morale has been 
so bad that in desperation they have 
turned for help to the Gospel in some of its 
forms. 

The harm that he does is chiefly in 
strengthening weak minds and wills bent 
toward vice or sin, and furnishing to strong 
minds with bad hearts materials for impu- 
dent repartees. To any one in or out of the 
Church who is not far from the kingdom of 
God his spirit and sentiments would be so 
odious that they would as soon think of 
taking poison as to have any conmunication 
with him on the subject of religion. 

FINIS. 

Private character has no place in argu- 
ment; but mental analysis is essential to 
interpret a man's relation to faith. In self- 
righteousness Colonel Ingersoll surpasses 
the Pharisees and equals any fanatic that 
ever lived. This can be shown by his own 



Istgersoll under the Microscope. 33 

testimony. In an address before the Nine- 
teenth Century Club he says : 

My good friend, General Woodford — and he is 
a good man telling the best he knows — says that 
I will be accountable at the bar up yonder. I am 
ready to settle that account now, and expect to be 
every moment of my life, and when that settle- 
ment comes, if it does come, I do not believe that 
a solitary being can rise and say that I ever in- 
jured him or her. 

This is what he says of himself. Unless 
he repents and tries to undo the evil he has 
done, when he appears before that bar what 
he can truthfully say will be something like 
this: 

" I was born where thousands of the best 
and most philanthropic people believed that 
there is a God, that he is the Father of all 
men, and that all men are brothers. I ridi- 
culed their faith in God in an abusive, friv- 
olous, irreverent manner. If I admitted 
that there might be a Supreme Being I took 
pains to say that he could neither 'be helped 
nor hurt,' and ' that people need not trouble 
themselves about the Infinite.' Most of 
these persons believed that men are placed 
in this world to prepare for a glorious des- 



34 Ingersoll under the Microscope. 

tiny, and rejoiced in the thought of an im- 
mortality of peace, love, and joy. They 
were often tempted, but, believing in God 
and in Jesus Christ his only Son, and in a 
punishment to shun and a life eternal to 
gain, they struggled on, and tried to teach 
their children the sentiments that had been 
so helpful to them. I caricatured and de- 
nounced their faith. 

" I was ever ready to sow the seeds of un- 
belief, and on one occasion chose the Christ- 
mas season to ridicule the carols of faith, 
hope, and love by slandering the Gospel and 
declaring it a message of eternal grief. 

" 1 despised and traduced the religion that 
contains the Sermon on the Mount, the par- 
able of the good Samaritan, the parable of 
the prodigal son, the prayer of the publican, 
and the story of the penitent thief. I eulo- 
gized whisky, and my portrait and name 
were the companion and encouragement of 
drunkards. 

u The suicide fortified himself by my 
teachings, saying that if there were any 
hereafter he would have a better chance 
than he had here, and if there were none lie 



Ingersoll under the Microscope. 35 

would never know it. The more calculating 
criminals rejoiced in my teachings, and the 
publishers of obscene publications to be 
sent through the mails counted upon me as 
their defender. 

" I did all this, and gave those from whom 
I took the bread of life only the cold stones 
of unbelief, to chill and sink them in de- 
spair, and the scorpions of my own venomous 
words against the Church of Christ." 

Yet such is the state of this man's mind 
that he says: "I not believe that a solitary 
being can rise and say that I ever injured 
him or her ! " 

The wisdom of Jesus characterized such 
a mental and moral condition: "If the light 
that is in thee be darkness, how great is 
that darkness ? " 

If such words and such a spirit as proceed 
from the mouth and pen of Colonel Ingersoll 
affected the intellect, only the experience of 
most persons of trial and sorrows and the 
example of true and consistent Christians, 
together with the drawings from above of 
the Holy Spirit, might be expected to coun- 
teract them in most cases. But they weaken 



36 IxGERSOLL UNDER THE MICROSCOPE. 

the restraints of conscience, strengthen 
passion and appetite, exclude from the soul 
all high spiritual ideals and lead to con- 
tinual self-indulgence. Thus chains of evil 
habit are forged, and those who accept his 
views become in spirit like himself or sink 
in conduct according to their temperament 
and surroundings. Some of his devotees 
simply ignore God and religion, saying little 
upon the subject ; others oppose and con- 
temn it and plunge into vice; others are 
zealous to spread their barren and poison- 
ous ideas, corrupting the faith of the young 
whenever they have opportunity. 

The man who would choose Ingersoll 
rather than Jesus as his teacher is of like 
mind with those who cried " Release unto 
us Barabbas! " The youth who takes In- 
gersoll for the guide of his life prefers a 
stone to bread, a scorpion to a fish. 



llL™,S,T,,, 0F CONGRESS 



021 898 622 5 



